我不是王子,你不是公主
但…你的心,是我的億萬城堡
而…我的愛,是你的億萬麵包
法蘭克&曾善美
(蔡進來&朵蕾咪)
幸福麵包的滋味是 ...
當你找到適合你的愛情時,同時你亦找到你的麵包 ... 味道是「淡淡的」 ... 感受是「久久的」 ...
I received this very funny email from a co-worker. Definitly need to "stay low" on when going into work .. hehehe
EFFECTIVE IMMEDIATELY
NEW OFFICE POLICY
Dress Code:
1) You are advised to come to work dressed according to
your salary.
2) If we see you wearing Prada shoes and carrying a
Gucci bag, we will assume you are doing well financially
and therefore do not need a raise.
3) If you dress poorly, you need to learn to manage your
money better, so that you may buy nicer clothes, and
therefore you do not need a raise.
4) If you dress just right, you are right where you need
to be and therefore you do not need a raise.
Sick Days:
We will no longer accept a doctor's statement as proof
of sickness. If you are able to go to the doctor, you are able to come to work.
Personal Days:
Each employee will receive 104 personal days a year.
They are called Saturdays & Sundays.
Bereavement Leave:
This is no excuse for missing work. There is nothing you can do for dead friends,
relatives or co-workers. Every effort should be made to have non-employees attend
the funeral arrangements in your place. In rare cases where employee involvement is
necessary, the funeral should be scheduled in the late afternoon. We will be glad to
allow you to work through your lunch hour and subsequently leave one hour early.
Bathroom Breaks:
Entirely too much time is being spent in the toilet.
There is now a strict three-minute time limit in the
stalls. At the end of three minutes, an alarm will
sound, the toilet paper roll will retract, the stall
door will open, and a picture will be taken. After your
second offense, your picture will be posted on the
company bulletin board under the 'Chronic Offenders'
category. Anyone caught smiling in the picture will be
sectioned under the company's mental health policy.
Lunch Break:
* Skinny people get 30 minutes for lunch, as they need
to eat more, so that they can look healthy.
* Normal size people get 15 minutes for lunch to get a
balanced meal to maintain their average figure.
* Chubby people get 5 minutes for lunch, because that's
all the time needed to drink a Slim-Fast.
Thank you for your loyalty to our company. We are here
to provide a positive employment experience. Therefore,
all questions, comments, concerns, complaints,
frustrations, irritations, aggravations, insinuations,
allegations, accusations, contemplations, consternation
and input should be directed elsewhere.
The Management
Pass this on to all who are employed!
每個人心中都有一座屬於自己的秘密花園,無論是何時何地,都沒有人可以搶走裡面的溫馨和回憶…